ANTISOCIAL 2.0

Normally I try not to criticize Liz Armstrong too much. Targeting the newest Reader regular suggests the paper was OK pre-redesign, and I certainly wouldn't want to give that impression. But this week Liz proves to have her head nestled so deeply in her butt, her sphincter muscles must be seriously impeding airflow. (Actually, reduced oxygen to the brain could explain a lot.)

Liz reports from Wired magazine's NextFest expo at Navy Pier. Why would the Reader send their "society" columnist to cover an event showcasing next-generation technology? Are they that eager to give me something to write about?

Among Liz's insights into the future of technology:

-Liz is no fan of Navy Pier.
-It's easy to slip into big Navy Pier events without paying.
-GM is trying to present itself as ecologically correct -- even though, in actuality, it not only pollutes a lot but manufactures gas-guzzling Hummers! The nerve!!!
-To indicate your distaste for SUVs, you can refer to them as "FUVs." (The "F" stands for "fucking," get it? Very clever.)
-Philip K. Dick's "Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?" is "still one of the best pieces of literature about the dangers of artificial intelligence."

Actually, I'm inclined to accept her judgment on that last point. When it comes to artificial intelligence, Liz is clearly an expert.